in the Guardian.(Sorry John)
Some people here – those of you who have some idea of who I am – may regret that I only got to be the greatest Prime Minister Australia has ever had for two years.
Now let me tell you'se this. When I was prime minister I didn’t tell you guys how to run their international relations I just lectured Australians on the subject continuously.
But hay, I’m now at a bit of a loose end and I couldn't pass up the opportunity of a free flight with free onions to watch the Wallabies give the Kiwis a kick up the arse in the rugby World Cup final?
Anyhow do you know why Australia is so good at rugby? Well mates let me tell ya.
Now if you Brits want to get good at rugby again you’re going to have to learn to do the same thing.
Now here’s the problem with Europe. You’re just a bunch of wankers and pussies. You’re too bloody nice to foreigners. Every time a loser turns up at your borders whinging about how hard their lives are, you fall for their sob stories. Let me tell you straight. You gotta be mean and man up, before it’s too late.
Jesus himself once told me in person, if you don’t look after number one then everyone else will just take advantage of you. Always put yourself first like the bible says.
Anyhow sometimes you’ve gotta be cruel to be kind. Once hundreds of thousands of them die they will realise they were better off dying, don't matter where they came from.
The problem wasn’t that the west created too many wars, but that it didn’t create enough. We should have taken out every country in that part of the world while we still could. Bomb, bomb, bombety, bomb.