SoccerRoos to break new ground?"Prosthesis"

The Australian soccer team is set to break new ground, in a medical breakthrough they have begun testing a new prosthetic arm that is easier to remove and replace.

It is rumoured that the team is about to have all their players that are likely to be in the goal square have their arms removed and replaced by the these prosthesis. It is envisioned that whenever a corner is awarded to the opposing team, the defenders will remove their arms and place them in the containers situated near the side line.

Each of the arms will be micro chipped to ensure fast and accurate refitting. This way a penalty would never be awarded against them.

The other alternative is to use the prosthesis, but to swap the arms around between the players, that way the players can always claim the arm the obstructed was not theirs.

This is not the preferred method as some players believe that referees would no doubt still blame the wrong player. They believe that it is only a matter of time before a player on the bench is sent off.

The Australians believe that it has proved impossible to improve the limited eye site of referees, so instead this will give the Australians the upper hand.

Harry Kewell

testing the new lightweight

prosthesis

Harry volunteered for them to be fitted because he believes

that his existing arms have been a liability.

England may take a similar step inside goal

In the likely hood that the Australians do go ahead with this option it is believed that England will be looking at something similar for goal keepers, it seems that their is a loophole in the rules that will allow large hands with a glue like substance to be fitted.

 

This is prototype of the proposed hands to be fitted. They are to be fitted with a homing

device that detects when a soccer ball is within reach and launches the goalie in the right

direction.